For those who know, that it is more than meets the eye. Like everything else in life. Merry Christmas everyone and a Happy New Year. :D
I don't know if you even visit my blog, but I thought it's just better if I let it out there, but not really. If you know what I mean. Hah. I doubt you even care about me la. Nvm. Never have I been so serious or so sure of what I want. Never has a girl taught me to love unselfishly, yet taught me how deep this love can cut and hurt you at the same time. Have you ever loved to such a large extent that you confuse yourself in the end? You want to be with her so much because you love her, but in the end you love her so much that you don't care if you're with her or not, but only care if she remains happy in her life whatever that takes. I'm getting those kinda effed up feelings right now. Not only that but also I think about how am I supposed to put up with all the other "cute" guys already after you. You can be with anyone, but I can't be with any other.
I don't know how more obvious my feelings for you can get, but I hope you see it sooner or later that I'm the one who wants to be with you. I've been there for you and known you for 9 months without even realising it. I doubt you even care or realise it yourself. I've seen friends come and pass, like waves washing on and off your shore. There are those waves who return of course. But I've been with you like the sun. Just like the sun is still there even if it sets and you can't see, I'll come around to shine again. lol Syaz you're getting all cheesy. Regarding that night on Christmas eve, you cannot imagine how I felt la. If you still don't understand why I'm so agitated, you can ask me yourself personally. If you even care. I had plans just so you know first. But I guess I don't matter as much, do I? I feel like such an idiot that night. I find it hard to believe you, but I do. And I'm sorry for everything wrong that I've done and said to you that might have ruined the one thing you've highly anticipated all year... Sorry.The song you're most probably listening to now (if you're playing my playlist here) is Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence by a composer named Ryuichi Sakamoto. It's a beautiful piece that got him famous, written long ago for a movie titled like the piece itself. I haven't watched the movie myself, but I find the song soothing to listen to if you're stressed out, having problems or just wanna be in peace. I should've already sent you this song, if I didn't that means I don't like you. Wahaha.
Labels: holidays, thoughts
