I'm screaming "I love you so" but my thoughts you can't decode
Monday, December 29, 2008
Madness. Apparently it seems I'm so caught up in my thoughts and have totally gone bonkers from all the pressure of it. I've never found myself so involved in something like this so emotional or dramatic whatever suits the situation, I admit it's my first. I've never been so fed up with myself. I've been having sleepless nights since Christmas eve, and it's taking a toll on me. I just learned something new about myself though, that I tend to eat a hell lot when I get into this state. Also for instance the first few words that came out of Shahrir's mouth when I saw him today was that I looked pale. I couldn't make sure of it myself cause there wasn't a mirror nearby. -.- What do I look like, a vampire? haha. Which leads me to the next topic;
Twilight. I watched it a couple of days ago and what's with all the disappointment? It was alright (remember my theory and I haven't read the book)! I thought it's worth the ticket money, also the storyline is something very unique as compared to other love stories. I mean it's always about one human battling for his raging love for another human, but this. This is vampires. Very interesting point of view for a change. haha. Although I guess it's dpdp, as always (Quoted from Cass :P). But what got me hyped up (sorta) for Twilight was when I was checking the soundtrack at HMV Heeren while waiting for the screening time, and I saw MUSE's Supermassive Blackhole as one of the track! The first track to it in fact. Bloody hell, all my hopes shot right up for Twilight that I was starting to get paranoid it would disappoint me too. Hahaha. But the latest hit "Decode" by Paramore totally go me HOOKED. And I mean hooked like it's playing like a broken record in my mind, and whenever I pick up my guitar I will definitely, instinctively, play the "unreal" riff from Decode. And the acoustic version of it is nothing short of brilliant. It is by far the best Paramore has to offer, for me. Which leads me to another topic again;
Holidays are nearly over, ZOMG! But it's alright, I've got one HUGE THING to look forward to next year.TALENT QUEST '09! For those who are already lost on wth am I talking about, visit here. Exactly what you're thinking. My band is participating! TOTALLY GOT ME EXCITED AND PUMPING MAN! HAHAHA. That's cause this is the first time the band has ever decided to take a higher and serious step in the local music industry. So it's all very new to me and most others. Thus, I pray that we will benefit from the experience and at least make it through the auditions (which is this Sunday, 5th Jan). But heck, we're aiming all the way! WOOHOO! I'll introduce you to the band first.
Band name: Decent Outbreak (D.O.) Formation date: Unconfirmed Consists of:
Shazlin (Vocalist) - my primary school ex-classmate, best friends since then
Shahrir (Rhythm Guitarist) - Shazlin's current schoolmate
Josiah (Drummer) - Shi Hng's ex-colleague's friend
Shi Hng (Bassist) - my secondary school ex-classmate for all 4 years, my chinese brother from another mother
Syazwan (Lead Guitarist) - Me, of course
No sorry but unfortunately I won't be putting any pictures up for recognititon and yes, female vocalist. Inevitably, apparently, we cover Paramore songs (especially Decode! WAHAHAHA). Most of the genres we cover are punk/pop/rock/alternative. However our influences vary widely among the individual band members. Shazlin and Shahrir are pretty into the same thing, punk/rock/alternative. Josiah's into acid jazz. Shi Hng's is punk/rock/alternative/screamo/metal. Mine would be progressive rock/classical/alternative/pop. Which is good for the band I think, because of the wide exposure of range of music that we have that we can and hopefully might be able to blend and mix the variety to see fit in creating our originals. Currently we have 2 originals. One is fully complete while the other has the guitar/vocals/piano parts down. We have never performed live yet, that is why hopefully through the competition we can gain valuable experiences and opportunities. If we ever make it through the auditions that is.
All in all, with all the frustrating thoughts messing up my mind I'm glad I have the band as a distraction. I tried to get a job for the same reason but to no avail. The band is all I have now. Now I see why they say your band is a disfunctional family (quoted from the loading screen of Guitar Hero III). Hahaha. This Sunday huh. Then let's do this. (:
P.S. I found the trailer to the movie "Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence" that I mentioned in a recent post. I'm gonna just put it here in case you're interested. hahaha. It's um... weirdly interesting.
For those who know, that it is more than meets the eye. Like everything else in life. Merry Christmas everyone and a Happy New Year. :D
I don't know if you even visit my blog, but I thought it's just better if I let it out there, but not really. If you know what I mean. Hah. I doubt you even care about me la. Nvm. Never have I been so serious or so sure of what I want. Never has a girl taught me to love unselfishly, yet taught me how deep this love can cut and hurt you at the same time. Have you ever loved to such a large extent that you confuse yourself in the end? You want to be with her so much because you love her, but in the end you love her so much that you don't care if you're with her or not, but only care if she remains happy in her life whatever that takes. I'm getting those kinda effed up feelings right now. Not only that but also I think about how am I supposed to put up with all the other "cute" guys already after you. You can be with anyone, but I can't be with any other. I don't know how more obvious my feelings for you can get, but I hope you see it sooner or later that I'm the one who wants to be with you. I've been there for you and known you for 9 months without even realising it. I doubt you even care or realise it yourself. I've seen friends come and pass, like waves washing on and off your shore. There are those waves who return of course. But I've been with you like the sun. Just like the sun is still there even if it sets and you can't see, I'll come around to shine again. lol Syaz you're getting all cheesy. Regarding that night on Christmas eve, you cannot imagine how I felt la. If you still don't understand why I'm so agitated, you can ask me yourself personally. If you even care. I had plans just so you know first. But I guess I don't matter as much, do I? I feel like such an idiot that night. I find it hard to believe you, but I do. And I'm sorry for everything wrong that I've done and said to you that might have ruined the one thing you've highly anticipated all year... Sorry.The song you're most probably listening to now (if you're playing my playlist here) is Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence by a composer named Ryuichi Sakamoto. It's a beautiful piece that got him famous, written long ago for a movie titled like the piece itself. I haven't watched the movie myself, but I find the song soothing to listen to if you're stressed out, having problems or just wanna be in peace. I should've already sent you this song, if I didn't that means I don't like you. Wahaha.
I want to watch Twilight. HAHAHA. I know, you're probably sick of hearing this by many others already. But seriously, it seems interesting. The trailer at least. I haven't read the book myself so I'm basically going in with no expectations. Maybe that's why many others find it disappointing or not as good as they expected it to be, because they've read the book. So my advice to you is, don't read the book first?
It's pretty much similar to Harry Potter's case if you look at it this way. Comparing the book to the movie... yeah, you know.
Also I've just watched Sky of Love, a Japanese movie recommended to me by a Japanese girl wannabe friend of mine. It's the best non-english movie I've ever seen. To think about it, it's the only non-english movie I've ever seen. Nonetheless the movie is great. The whole stretch of it. If the girls ever feel like shedding a tear (or rather a stream of tears), this is the movie to catch. For guys? I don't know, just watch. It might teach you a thing or two about love I hope.
LASTLY, the 3rd movie I'm gonna talk to you about is The Day The Earth Stood Still! But I'm not gonna talk to you about it in this post, because it's gonna be loooong. Hahaha
Instead I'm gonna put some pictures up which I'm supposed to EONS AGO. Enjoy.
W34G
-
That was on the last day of school by the way, W14E Semester 1 Yr 1. The day we had a soccer match in class, the day we climbed shifted tables, the day we clubbed in class, and many more. :D
It's quite something isn't it? Drawn with Microsoft Paint. Had Communications today and during 3rd meeting it was drawn right out of boredom, deprive of sleep and utter frustration. Voila! Hahaha. Alright it's not all nonsense but really that's how the result is if I were to express the thoughts running through my mind through a drawing now. I was just reflecting upon a time of an earlier me (not so early, just like months ago), and I realise alot can happen in a month, even in a day. I'm just trying to say I've changed so much, in one year. I feel like I've gone through 3 different person of myself in just one 1 year. Meh, don't even know why I'm talking about this. I need to sleep now. Been sick for a long time. Too long.
oh yeah, HOLIDAYS ARE HERE! AND SO IS CHRISTMAS! :D
it's 10:16 now
go on, shoot.
MSBK.
The people he grew up with has grown fond of just calling him Syaz, Syazi or Wan. Preferrably Syaz.
31031991
Tossed into the wildlife of Republic Polytechnic on 2008.
He is notoriously known for being forgetful, messy and a bad cook.
And no he's not something to step on like a piece of fabric made of plaited or woven rushes, straw, hemp, or similar fiber, or of some other pliant material, as rubber, used as a protective covering on a floor, like a mat.
No he's not even legally a Malay.
A man of few words, but a man of his words nonetheless.
